LIVING OUR QUESTIONS–ARE OUR INTIMATE RELATIONSHIPS REFLECTIVE OF OUR CONNECTION WITH SELF.

At times I wonder about the judgment I sometimes have for those closest to me. On occaison I have judged one or more of “being selfish” which immediately sets me up to be “better than”. After all I am so kind, generous, loving and COMPROMISING! What’s wrong with them? Is there something wrong with them or the lens through which I choose to see them?  What if they are better at advocating for what they want and need  expecting others to do the same for themselves.  What if I am only calling them selfish(of course in my mind ONLY not that they can’t see by my tight jaw and smile) because I cannot or will not get clear in situations about what I really want?  I might have to hold my ground when Iwould prefer the absence of conflict. Is it just easier to call them selfish?   According to my standard of judgment, if I asserted myself,  wouldn’t that make me “selfish” too? Can I treat others any differently than I treat myself? Let me know what you think and HAVE A GREAT LABOR-FREE DAY!

Advertisements

4 Responses to LIVING OUR QUESTIONS–ARE OUR INTIMATE RELATIONSHIPS REFLECTIVE OF OUR CONNECTION WITH SELF.

  1. Labeling people is always a tricky thing…unless you are using the labels in reference to small children, in which case, they probably apply.

    • livingourquestions says:

      Labeling is dangerous and inaccurate–we are all so much more than a label or thought in someone else’s head

  2. Jeffrey K says:

    this is a great question. i grapple with it occasionally, and i hope many others do, too, because judging shouldn’t be simple or thoughtless. but i feel like we frequently have to judge in order to navigate the complex and seemingly chaotic world of our day-to-day lives, and it’s not always possible to reflect on our snap judgments. so, when we can reflect, we should relish that chance and make the most of it to hone our philosophies and relationships.

  3. I think there is a difference between judgment and discernment. One has a negative charge and the other seems as you say to allow us to navigate the complexities of our own life–the day to day chaos. I do sometimes see my judgment as a way to create distance… sometimes to feel safe, or superior or unfortunately to bond with another. I am trying to hold myself to a higher standard of acceptance looking to see when I am judging if whatever it is I am judging could be some denied part of myself. Thanks for your comment.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: